Day 7: The Man and The Thank You

Thank you.

If you are reading this, thank you.

I started this journey, and this blog, a week ago, after a night with friends and some serious reflection. I am still very green to both. I am getting used to the ebb and flow of what it feels like to be alone and I am still very much getting used to the daily practice of writing. Patience, both on my part and on yours, dear readers, will certainly be needed as I grow in both respects.

I have never allowed myself to face my fears in such a broad and permanent way, and I findPool that the thoughts and sensations that I have been running from are opening so many
perspectives and emotions. I am running through all of them and as I do I am cataloging and preparing all of my future posts and topics. I am constantly realizing more and more topics that I believe need to be expressed and that I believe could be helpful for all to read. My emotions are so much more intense and my experiences are so much more raw because I have stripped away any possibility to escape or hide them. I am facing singlehood and loneliness on a grand scale that I have never faced before.
At the same time I have never pushed myself to be so open and so expressive on such a regular and consistent schedule. There are times when I am grateful for the opportunity and yet still I fear for the future when the words either run dry or worse, the emotions I uncover are too powerful for me to express. For now I enjoy and thrill at how freely my words flow and the electricity that pulses at the tips of my fingers as they frantically race. Letters become words, words become sentences, sentences become paragraphs, and for the first time I actually feel as ATVthough I have found my opportunity to share myself with others.

I am grateful for every time I see someone has viewed my post. I am thrilled at every like. It is an affirmation that maybe just maybe my words do in fact ring true with more than just myself. I vow to myself and to you, dear readers, to improve and to stay true and strong and straight on this path and to deliver every victory, loss, thought, fear, and hope along the way. I hope to see this blog grow, and this connection, as ethereal as it is right now, to grow stronger and more expansive with more of the world.

I will be honest with you now though. I am looking down the barrel of a week that I am dreading. Honestly I am just trying to ride the high of yesterday right now and not think too much about it. I know that this week is going to be very difficult and I will have to wrestle with a lot of issues. This is not going to be Man’s week, and I am hesitant to face it. I am grateful for the day and for this moment, but this week is going to be rough and it will
take all of my strength to face it. But I soldier on. I am still here. I am still Man.

Thank you. For everything. For being here.

Day 7

Man: 6 Loneliness: 1

 

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